Ever since I was a child I dreamt of being an architect. I would love to play by myself building homes, buildings. Some of my favorite toys were Legos and Power City Construction. I would design airports, shopping centers, skyscrapers, office buildings… I would play with my Matchbox cars in my imaginary city.
I wanted to design. I had a rich imagination to envision futuristic cars, buildings, homes. I was very driven to study hard and achieve my dream. By the time I was in High School I was focused on Engineering. At the time I wanted to go to the University of Miami.
Many of us have had similar experiences, each according to a particular area or interest. These are fundamental passions of the heart. We will listen to experts advise the young to follow their dreams: “Follow your passion”. It makes sense. Anything worth achieving will require perseverance and determination. These fundamental passions of the heart are usually strong enough to face many odds.
However, a more fundamental question is in place. Where do these passions of the heart come from? How do they arise? Are they always good? Where is the will of God in all of this?
It has been my experience that these passions, while containing good elements, are not always 100% pure. Elements of pride, vanity, worldly ambition, anger, etc., could be mixed in with these fundamental passions we discover in ourselves. So, following the heart without taming it at the same time, could be a dangerous recipe. There is a huge problem that we face as we follow our dreams: It is not easy to recognize these evil elements in our dreams. This requires much self knowledge and a good doses of humility.
And so, very naïvely we plunge into the world following these passions of our heart. Depending on how determined we are, we will eventually achieve some success. We use our personality given strengths. We feel confirmed in our decision and we continue striving for our dreams. Eventually we will start confronting deep, unknown dark motives in our hearts. It could be a repressed desire to be noticed. It could be a compulsive desire towards achievement as a way to be valued, appreciated. It could be a repressed anger. There is something pathological in all of this.
We continue following our dreams but eventually we realize that “it is all about me”. We start neglecting other responsibilities towards family, towards God. We could even become stars in the public eye, and yet our inner world be crumbling. “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Mt 16:26.
A very important aspect of our spiritual growth will be the “custody of the heart”. It is of utmost importance to examine ourselves daily: “What is my heart attached to?” The heart could be very treacherous. It could be like an octopus with many tentacles. No sooner have we detached it from worldly aspirations to seek God alone than it is already becoming attached to something else. We will continue exploring this concept of detachment, so essential to progress in the spiritual life.
Questions for pondering:
- What is your Passion in Life? What are your deepest dreams?
- Is there any stain of self seeking in that passion, in those dreams?
- What are the negative consequences of attachments in your life?
Fr Lino Otero, LC: Originally from Nicaragua, my family moved to Miami, Florida when I was a teenager. Soon afterwards I experienced the call to serve God without reservations. Since then, I have had experience in hospital ministry, working as a middle school teacher, leading a parish school, organizing soccer tournaments for kids, starting a radio station, training priests in leadership formation, organizing a parish community from maintenance to mission, and much more. I love spiritual direction and preaching. Years of philosophy, psychology and theological training have enriched my personal life and have shaped my message of hope. For more go to linootero.me
